I almost fainted

It was a nice Saturday evening, warm yet breezy, and I found myself running to my grandmother - no one else was home - because the blood on my finger refused to stop. To me, it kept pouring out like a mini waterfall and I was freaking out.

My grandmother is a master when it comes to dealing with injury. She rushed me to the kitchen, asked me to calm down and applied some turmeric. Now I would have calmed down if the blood had stopped but it still refused to stop, so being the smart person I am, I panicked some more. And then, I panicked so much that I got dizzy by the time my Dadi could find some cotton and cloth to wrap the wound with, sat down because I wasn't sure of my balance, my hearing dropped and I finally lay down on the bed till it was all wrapped up.

The funny thing is that all of this happened because I got a cut from a broken doorknob which had a pointy metal piece sticking out. Amusing fact two: it couldn't have been more than a few drops of blood.  Isn't that super life threatening? I still can't believe how I overreacted to that level. Pretty much my entire family laughed when they heard about what happened so I figured I'd let you'll facepalm as well.

This isn't the only fear I have. Among others, there's one of pigeons and cockroaches. I don't think it's a fear though, it's more of getting creeped out. And as long as they aren't in my house, I am alright. I guess I'm just afraid they won't be able to leave or they'll get hurt because of the fan or something at home.

But I tend to deal with these things in a very mature way. When a pigeon had come inside my house, I ran into my room and let my grandmom and friend direct it outside, refusing to come out till it was gone. See what I mean by mature, don't you? 😁

Everyone has stories about things they're afraid of and how they've dealt with them. I'd love to hear yours, especially if it's a funny one!

And as always, thanks for reading,
Kanksha💜

How are you feeling today?

HEY HEY HEY so if you're too bored to read, just listen along to the audio. If you don't know me, you get to find out how I sound like (with a messed up throat - it has been messed up since a couple of years, I hope that's not permanent but I digress) Check out the post definitely and the audio if you want!

I hope you're feeling good, and if you aren't, this one is for you.

Alone is something you'll be quite a lot in life. I don't think I was ever afraid of being lonely before, at least not as a kid. I'd find something to do, and even when simply lost to my own thoughts, I'd end up roaming all around the house, singing a song or doing nothing, still happy. Not anymore. When I'm bored I'm constantly looking for something to do but don't get more than momentary satisfaction out of it. I've stopped reading which is one thing that probably helped me deal with having nothing to do. When I'd read, I wouldn't care about what was going on. I didn't care about food, I didn't care about my friends (or lack of even), I was in my own world.

Now you see people going out all day, hanging out with each other. Friday and Saturday nights are spent outside and the number of beautiful looking (God knows how nice tasting) food on snapchat is unbelievable. People are comfortable enough to embrace each other and show the love that way but actually sit, speak and care? You won't find many.

Friendships are sometimes just so fragile and fake, it's irritating. But we all need friends, don't we? We all want a group of people we have fun with, or at least are able to claim we have fun with. We don't want to show the world when we're sad, but we want every one to know you're jumping on a trampoline happy every minute of your life.

Depression is the talk of the town these days. No-one knows what's going on. People give up easily, take to drugs more easily, think that they've failed more easily. They don't believe in themselves, and while admittedly it's getting even more and more difficult, self belief is very important to survive. Sad songs, emotionally moving dances, heartfelt spoken word poetry - there is so much sad stuff out there for people to relate to but sometimes I feel that just pulls you down.

Take one day maybe as you drown in the comfort of music that'll make you cry but delete it the very next and replace it with happy upbeat tunes. Let the pain release with some tai chi and push it away from your body as you grow from it. Talk to your friends, talk to your family, talk to yourself. Cry and get it all out. But once it's out, it's out. Shut your mental doors and start doing things. Make yourself busy in things that make you happy.

Let Vitamin D seep in your body as you sunbathe in the late morning on your lunch break and goosebumps travel down your skin as you enjoy the breeze after your run in the evening.

Breathe.

Start doing happy things for people because you'll realise you'll feel a hundred times happier. Send a gift to all your friends or even make them a card, it doesn't have to be anything expensive. 

When you notice something nice about someone, tell them. My school friend blushed for two whole minutes when we told him he looked fitter, it was adorable.

Give unexpected surprises without expecting anything in return. 

A warm hug, pull of cheeks or even a pat on the back - any sign of affection - could brighten someone's day.

Keep expressing yourself. Keep breathing.

Everything always works out, even though it seems it doesn't.

Lots of love,
Kanksha :)

P.S. I really need to work on my goodbye, that was really awkward I know, assuming you listened to the audio